Blog

  |   Blog

At The Woodsman At The Empire

People sure can be weird and fucked.

I went to see the Woodsman and it was sold out. I was a little surprised for the kind of film it is, but it was a Friday night at 8pm so people just see whatever is available. There were maybe five seats in the 70-seat auditorium. I saw one in front of the railing with coats on it. I asked and the seat was available, but the woman with the coats gave me this odd look of horror. I put my stuff in the chair also, got some popcorn and sat.

The old woman on my right didn’t want to move her coat. I sat down and she draped her coat OVER ME. I pushed it over and she gave a harrumph! Her coat was still on top of me so I just moved my arm on top. Normally I’d crunch the whole thing over to her side, but I felt like being calm and cool. About 15 minutes later she looks for something in her coat and completes drapes the coat over me. I’m like, Okay… Finally I picked up one of her sweaters she laid on top of me and put it over the railing in front of us. She said, Thanks. I curled her coat up and moved it more to her seat.

The guy next to me was a trip. He kept laughing throughout the movie. It’s not really a ‘comedy.’ He also shifted a bunch and would pick up his coat over the railing, refold it, and set it back down. Then, and this was so weird, I ate a small bag of popcorn and put my bag on the floor. A few minutes later the guy on my left picked up the bag and said, Do you want this? I said, Uh no, It’s empty. He said, Because it’s in ‘my space.’ I took the bag from him. And put it in my space.

The Woodsman had one of the weirdest audiences. There were definitely some pederasts looking for their thrills in this flick. I guess watching Kevin Bacon ask a young girl if she’d like to sit in his lap might do it for them.

Weird night at the movies.